Football Star Dying in Her Arms Before Pregnancy News as Kelly Kay Unveils Baby Spider (exclusive)

Spencer Webb’s girlfriend Kelly Kay opens up to PEOPLE about their newborn son Spider’s first few weeks and how she’s keeping Webb’s memory alive. Webb was a former Oregon football player. Kelly Kay claims that their newborn son Spider has been able to bring new joy into her life even though she is still grieving the tragic death of her late college football player partner Spencer Webb.

Exclusively speaking with PEOPLE, the model, who had son Spider Webb on March 30, discusses the first few weeks with her kid and how she’s keeping Webb’s memory alive through their son.

Webb, a University of Oregon athlete known by the moniker Spider, passed unexpectedly at the age of 22 in a rock-sliding mishap just one week before Kay found out she was pregnant.

“I attended. I held Spencer as he died,” Kay admits. He was taken from the water by me, and I held his head until the paramedics arrived. But regrettably, he passed away just as they arrived.

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Football Star Dying in Her Arms Before Pregnancy News as Kelly Kay Unveils Baby Spider (Exclusive)

“I couldn’t believe it. That day, I also passed away. It’s absurd,” she continues. “I was simply chatting to him and telling him, ‘We’re going home,’ the entire time we were waiting for the paramedics. We’re leaving right now. I had a sliver of optimism that maybe everything would work out, but it didn’t work out that way.

Kay visited the doctor the following week to have a blood test done to determine whether she was pregnant. “Ghost” by Justin Bieber was playing when the doctor entered the room to break the news, which Kay believes was an indication that Webb was in the same room as her.

It’s a very emotional song about someone going away, and I played it as one of the songs during the memorial I had for him, she explains. “When the doctor informed me, I thought, he must know. The signal is this. This was supposed to occur. Even though I felt miserable, there was a tiny bit of delight inside of me knowing that I would get to keep some of him.

Kay says she wasn’t the only one to experience Webb’s presence.

“That song started playing as I was ready to check out as I was shopping for pregnancy clothes at the mall. I kept thinking that Spencer ought to be with me when I was shopping. I wanted him there to support me and instill confidence in me the way he always did. When that music started, I thought, “Okay, he’s here.”

Kay claims that she felt “very lonely” and depressed the entire time she was pregnant, “just wishing that Spencer was here.”

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Football Star Dying in Her Arms Before Pregnancy News as Kelly Kay Unveils Baby Spider (Exclusive)

She begins to cry and says, “The pregnancy was second to the worst thing that’s ever happened to me besides that day.” The first maybe five or six months escape my memory. It was extremely difficult, especially when combined with pregnancy morning sickness, general depression, and not eating.

Regarding Spider’s birth, Kay reports that “everything went so smoothly.” “I had that focus point since I brought Spencer’s jersey and a large blown-up image of him. In the room with me were my mom, my doula, and my closest friend. I finished it by simply staring at that image of Spencer. Everything went so smoothly, and the baby was born perfectly healthy.

Kay claims she is loving “every single second” of parenting after having her baby boy. She says, “The joy of the new baby has lifted me out of the gloom I was in, but I think the grief of losing Spencer is a chip on my shoulder that will never go away.”

“[Spider] is my best friend and my new favorite human being, and I love every second of it,” said the user. We sleep together and cuddle, he looks at me when he smiles, and we even deal with weeping and poopy diapers together,” she says. “I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”

“I’m just overjoyed to have a best friend once more. A best friend, a lover, and a partner were all I ever desired in life. And Spencer stepped into those shoes, and now that he’s gone, I feel like I have Spider, and he won’t ever leave me,” she adds. “I own him. He is here always. That’s it. There is now more than just Kelly Kay. Kelly and Spider are together forever.

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Football Star Dying in Her Arms Before Pregnancy News as Kelly Kay Unveils Baby Spider (Exclusive)

In “every way possible,” Kay said she will keep Webb’s memory alive in the future. “Our house is covered in photos. There are so much memorabilia here. And he will always know who his father is as he grows up.

I intend to send him to Oregon, and I already know he’ll be a D1. He’s already going continuously,” she chuckles. “We’re both really active individuals. Sending him to football is my plan, and I’ll try to emulate Spencer as much as I can.

We’re going to make sure to live through Spencer’s strength and guidance to make him proud, even though his son and I are beginning this new life with some difficulties.